Fruit

Cezanne snitched an apple from his still life, saying,
It won't much matter if I take that one over there.
And that's why all his paintings have fewer apples than pears,
It's 'cause he didn't really like the taste of pears.

Adam in the garden snitched an apple,
From a tree on which the snake had made a dare,
And though Genesis don't say it, the real reason that he ate it,
Is 'cause he really didn't like the taste of pears.

Chorus:

And everything that's mentionable has a cause inconsequential
Or it seemed inconsequential at the time,
And something we may sneeze on gives the world it's rhyme and reason;
Yes, these things give life its reason and its rhyme.

I snitched an apple from the fruit bowl today,
And nothing's happened yet that that I'm aware,
But maybe as I grapple with the concept of an apple,
These words will make a difference in the air.

Chorus

I snitched an apple from the fruit bowl today,
And nothing consequential's happened yet.

some comments

I first performed this at the freshman talent show here at Whitman. There must have been several hundred people there, and a couple of drunken frat boys (sorry about the stereotype, but that's my assumption) were randomly shouting "Boom" as I sang it. I guess I got a standing ovation, but with the stage lights and the utter surreality of the situation, I attributed the upward motion in the the direction of the audience to my being almost about to faint backwards.

The next year they closed the freshman talent show to everyone but freshmen and their RA's. That really bummed me out.

Update, 10/2006: I just got back from my 10 year college reunion. Everyone still remembered my act in the freshman talent show, so they asked me for a repeat performance, and I obliged them. I left out the third verse, (which I couldn't remember, and I never liked) and the repeat of the chorus. I think that might be true to the version I sang at the freshman talent show, and the third verse was a later addition. (By the way, I totally rocked.)

One thing that the lyrics above don't make clear is that there are some scat bits before the first verse and between verses. I added them in because I needed to pad out the song a bit for the talent show perfomance, but they became a huge part of the character of the song.

A Song by Alexandre Muñiz, munizao@xprt.net